Loneliness is one of the most common experiences of the current generation. According to the Cigna U.S. Loneliness Index, three out of every five adults, or 61%, report that they sometimes or always feel lonely. Loneliness can be as damaging to health as smoking 15 cigarettes per day. People who experience social isolation have a 32% higher risk of early death. Isn’t it strange? Generation Z is hyperconnected in the virtual world but often socially disconnected in real life. The internet, mobile phones, and video games have created a multiverse of new connections and opportunities. However, digital interactions have not replaced the fundamental human need for emotional connection in the physical world.
What Is Loneliness?
Feeling lonely is not classified as a mental health condition. However, having a mental health condition can increase vulnerability to experiencing loneliness. Loneliness is a state of mind characterized by feelings of emptiness, isolation, or being unwanted. It is often perceived as an involuntary separation or abandonment by others. If you are experiencing loneliness, you may long for human contact. And yet your thoughts might prevent you from socializing and finding suitable company.
Emotional loneliness refers to the absence of an attachment figure, while social loneliness involves a lack of a social network—a circle of people that helps individuals develop a sense of belonging and community.
It is important to remember that loneliness is a universal human emotion and it varies from person to person. Some may only feel lonely at certain times, while others may experience chronic loneliness. It is possible to be surrounded by people and still feel alone; some individuals may even feel lonely while living alone, or believe that having few friends or family leads to loneliness. The feelings of isolation or rejection can intensify these emotions.
It is also crucial to distinguish between loneliness and solitude. Solitude is a voluntary state; people who enjoy spending time alone often maintain positive social relationships to return to when they desire companionship.
Causes of Loneliness
There are multiple reasons why one might experience loneliness in their lives. The prominent ones are:
- Death of a loved one
- Separation
- Retirement
- Old age
- Personality traits of introversion
- Life transitions like going to university
We might also experience bouts of loneliness during the year such as the holiday season or our birthdays and anniversaries.
Research suggests that some people are more vulnerable to loneliness than others. For example, if you:
- Have no friends or family
- Are estranged from your family
- Are a single parent or care for someone else, and find it hard to maintain a social life
- Belong to minority group and live in an area where there aren’t many people with a similar background to you
- Are excluded from social activities because of mobility problems
- Don’t have much money for certain social activities
- Experience discrimination and stigma because of your gender, race or your gender or sexual identity
- Have experienced sexual or physical abuse, which may mean you find it harder to form close relationships with other people
The Impact of Loneliness on our Health
Engaging with our communities and building social connections are essential for our health and overall development. Beyond the basics of physical health, factors like our ability to manage daily tasks, our sense of control over life, and the way we relate to society play key roles in shaping our well-being. These aspects fall under what we call “social vulnerability”—a concept closely linked to higher rates of frailty and even increased mortality in hospitals.
The effects of social vulnerability go beyond psychological and emotional realms, extending to our very cells and tissues. For instance, loneliness can trigger changes at the cellular level, impacting everything from vascular resistance to the progression of diseases like depression, cognitive decline, Alzheimer’s, obesity, stroke, and hypertension.
Much of this harm is driven by heightened vascular resistance, increased stress responses, immune changes, and inflammation, as stress hormones and inflammatory factors activate our immune cells.
Our social connections—or lack thereof—have a profound impact on our physical health.
What is triggering loneliness?
Divisive Society and the Rise in Loneliness
Polarization and Discord: Differences in opinions across social, political, and cultural issues have led to a fractured society, where people feel increasingly disconnected from those with opposing viewpoints.
Strained Relationships: These societal divisions strain friendships, erode trust, and reduce open, meaningful communication, often leaving individuals feeling isolated.
Worsening Alienation: Disengagement from social circles and the inability to engage in productive discourse have intensified feelings of loneliness and alienation.
The Double-Edged Nature of Social Media
Connection vs. Isolation: Although social media can connect people globally, it often results in a paradoxical sense of isolation.
Comparisons and Inadequacy: The curated images and highlights of others’ lives can create feelings of inadequacy, distorting perceptions of connectedness and reinforcing loneliness.
Replacing Real Connections: Excessive screen time and digital communication have replaced face-to-face interactions, reducing the depth and authenticity of relationships and increasing social isolation.
Shifts in Family Structure and Urbanization
Changing Family Dynamics: The rise of single-person households, fewer intergenerational homes, and geographically dispersed families mean less access to regular social support and interaction.
Urban Living and Work Demands: Long commutes, career-driven lifestyles, and intense work schedules have limited time for social engagement, weakening support networks and contributing to isolation.
Loneliness Among the Aging Population
Social Exclusion and Ageism: Older adults often face social exclusion and reduced access to community resources, particularly if they experience age-related health challenges.
Loss of Social Networks: Limited opportunities for meaningful interactions leave many seniors feeling isolated, impacting their mental health and overall well-being.
Infrastructure Challenges: A lack of age-friendly spaces and support systems further isolates older adults from the community, intensifying their sense of loneliness.
Gaps in Discourse and Empathy
Decline in Open Dialogue: Society lacks a culture of empathetic discourse, where individuals can openly share their experiences with others who may not agree but are willing to listen and understand.
Romantic Relationships and Distrust: Mistrust in romantic relationships, fueled by a culture of suspicion, has created barriers to forming deep connections. Both men and women fear being taken advantage of, leading to a breakdown in mutual respect and affection.
Toxic Meme Culture: The rise of meme culture has fueled a tendency to mock and one-up others, which can erode respect and civility, reinforcing divisions not only between genders but across political, religious, and generational divides.
How to Deal with Loneliness?
Loneliness, particularly among older adults, can feel overwhelming, but there are several practical strategies to alleviate these feelings and create a sense of connection, purpose, and well-being. Here are some effective approaches:
Community Engagement and Service Opportunities
Join Community Events and Clubs: Participating in community gatherings or joining clubs with shared interests, such as book clubs, gardening groups, or hobby classes, can create new friendships and a sense of belonging.
Volunteer for Meaningful Causes: Volunteering offers both purpose and social interaction. By helping others, individuals not only expand their social networks but also feel valued and connected to their community.
Create or Join Support Groups
Shared Experiences: Support groups bring together people with similar life challenges or interests, providing a safe space for sharing stories and offering mutual support.
Addressing Life Transitions: Older adults, who may be navigating retirement, health changes, or loss, benefit greatly from groups centered on shared experiences, which foster empathy and reduce loneliness.
Adopt a Pet for Companionship
Emotional Support: Pets like dogs and cats provide companionship, emotional comfort, and a sense of purpose, all of which enhance well-being.
Daily Interactions: Having a pet offers daily routines and social interaction, reducing feelings of loneliness by providing unconditional affection.
Pursue Hobbies and Interests
Creative Outlets: Hobbies like gardening, painting, cooking, or crafting provide a productive way to spend time and relieve stress.
Social Connections: Pursuing hobbies can lead to social opportunities through local classes, workshops, or online communities focused on shared interests.
Embrace Technology and Digital Connectivity
Stay Connected Virtually: Social media, video calls, and online forums can help seniors maintain relationships with family and friends, bridging geographical distances.
Explore Online Communities: Joining virtual groups focused on common interests or life experiences can help combat isolation and create new, meaningful connections.
Stay Physically Active
Exercise with Others: Joining a local exercise class, walking group, or yoga session allows for both physical health benefits and social interaction.
Build a Routine: Physical activity boosts mood, energy, and resilience, which can counteract feelings of loneliness and improve overall well-being.
Engage in Lifelong Learning
Take Classes or Workshops: Enrolling in classes on topics of interest, whether in-person or online, can stimulate the mind and offer new friendships.
Expand Social Circles: Lifelong learning settings provide opportunities to meet people with shared intellectual interests, building connections and promoting personal growth.
Addressing loneliness involves a holistic approach that incorporates community engagement, supportive relationships, physical and mental activity, and a sense of purpose. By embracing these strategies, individuals can build stronger connections, develop fulfilling routines, and enjoy a greater sense of belonging and well-being.
We understand that loneliness is difficult and there could be several reasons why you’re feeling this way. If you need professional support, do not hesitate to book a session using our online calendar.
