“The quality of your life is in direct proportion to the amount of uncertainty you can comfortably deal with.” ~Tony Robbins
Is anything in life certain other than this very moment? Can we ever guarantee what will happen and how it will unfold? These questions can be very anxiety-provoking, I’m aware. But the freedom that comes with accepting the very nature of life is unmatched. It facilitates the process of embracing life and living it fully present. Accepting uncertainty is a skill in tolerating uncomfortable emotions and building resilience. Developing both these skills is crucial for living a balanced and happy life. If you’re curious about this phenomenon, let’s dive together!
Although, a certain amount of control over our future actions gives us a sense of direction, knowing too much can block us from making progress. Uncertainty on the other hand opens up several avenues. Instead of just whipping up worst case scenarios, you are increasingly able to see how things go in your favour. But since it uncertainty makes us feel vulnerable, we try to avoid it. However, it seems a great paradox of life that it is actually through accepting uncertainty that we thrive. Our lives are greatly determined by what we do when we get uncertain.
Why Do We Fear Uncertainty?
Uncertainty scares us because, from an evolutionary and neuropsychological perspective, our brains are wired to seek safety and predictability. Early humans faced life-threatening dangers in their environment, such as predators or hostile conditions. In such situations, uncertainty could mean life or death, so our ancestors developed a natural inclination to avoid the unknown. The brain’s **amygdala**, which processes fear, becomes hyperactive when faced with uncertain situations, triggering a “fight or flight” response. This reaction was useful in ancient times to ensure survival but now manifests as anxiety or discomfort in modern, non-life-threatening uncertainties, like job changes or relationship conflicts.
Neuropsychologically, uncertainty activates the brain’s **dopaminergic system**, which is responsible for reward prediction. When we can’t predict outcomes, it disrupts the brain’s ability to evaluate risk and reward accurately, leading to feelings of anxiety or fear. This lack of control over outcomes makes uncertainty feel threatening.
Additionally, humans tend to prefer cognitive closure—the desire for clear, definite answers—because ambiguity can cause cognitive dissonance and stress. Studies have shown that when we’re unsure of what’s coming, the brain amplifies potential negative consequences, which magnifies our fear. This combination of evolutionary survival instincts and modern cognitive processes explains why uncertainty remains unsettling today.
Where To Start
You can start by gradually exposing yourself to small uncertainties and learning to cope with the discomfort they bring. Constantly remind yourself of the times you dealt with new situations and came out victorious. Whether it was starting at a new school or city, trying to make new friends or entering the workforce. Reflect on how you were able to see yourself through these situations. If you took help, was it through emotional support or self-reliance?
Focus on developing a flexible mindset that adapts to changing situations. Maintain a routine where possible, as it provides a sense of normalcy and stability. Practicing self-care and mindfulness regularly can also strengthen your ability to tolerate uncertainty.
Warm Up
Think about upcoming situations that you see as threatening. These could be forthcoming exams, job interviews, assignments you need to complete, or other stressful situations that involve an uncertain outcome. Think of up to three of these situations. Now, thinking of these as challenges that you can meet, write out three ways (for each situation) that you can overcome the difficulties that the situation poses. When you view a situation as a challenge, you’re combining recognition of the problem that needs to be addressed with faith that you can rise to the occasion and deal with it successfully.
Practice Mindfulness
Take some time to simply observe the thoughts and feelings that an uncertain situation brings up. Cultivate a more relaxed state of mind with regular mindfulness meditation. Mindfulness prevents you from getting ahead of time and imagining the worst case scenarios. If you’re someone prone to anxiety, mindfulness will definitely be beneficial in embracing uncertainty.
Locus of Control
Make a list of situations that you have a direct influence over vs those that are completely out of your control. These include: someone else’s actions and feelings, natural disasters, the weather, traffic, and so on. Doing this exercise gives us a perspective on what we need to worry about and what we can let go of.
Set Achievable Goals
When we are new to embracing uncertainty, it is good to have something to anchor us. This includes your daily routine, hobbies, relying on your support system. Achieving these small goals can provide a sense of accomplishment and control in times of uncertainty.
Benefits of Embracing Uncertainty
Embracing uncertainty isn’t about eliminating fear but learning to thrive despite it. When you step into the unknown with an open mind, you invite growth, creativity, and resilience into your life. Let go of the need for control, and instead, trust that uncertainty can lead to unexpected rewards.
Emotional Intelligence
Embracing uncertainty teaches you to manage emotions like fear and anxiety. Developing emotional intelligence helps you remain calm and grounded when faced with unknown circumstances. For example, rather than panicking about an upcoming presentation, you’ll focus on preparation and self-assurance.
Increased Creativity
Uncertainty pushes you out of your comfort zone, often leading to creative problem-solving. When clear answers aren’t available, you’re forced to think differently. This creative approach can drive innovation in both personal and professional areas. Entrepreneurs, for instance, often succeed because they embrace uncertainty.
Building Resilience
Handling uncertainty builds resilience. Every time you face and manage an unpredictable situation, you strengthen your ability to handle future challenges. Studies show that resilient people are better equipped to deal with stress, as they learn to adapt and maintain balance during uncertain times.
Greater Adaptability
The world is constantly changing, and those who embrace uncertainty are more adaptable. Whether it’s a sudden shift in personal plans or a global event like a pandemic, adaptability ensures that you can adjust and still move forward. Being open to change allows for smoother transitions in life.
Expands Opportunities
By accepting the unknown, you open yourself up to a wider range of possibilities. Opportunities often arise from unexpected situations. For example, moving to a new city may feel uncertain at first, but it could lead to meaningful friendships, career growth, and personal development.
The Domino Effect
- Uncertainty often plays a role in relationships, whether it’s in love, friendship, or family dynamics. When we accept that we can’t control everything, we become more flexible and patient with others. This adaptability can lead to stronger, more resilient relationships as we learn to navigate unknowns together.
- Fear of the unknown often prevents professionals from taking risks. However, those who embrace uncertainty become more comfortable with calculated risks. This opens the door to seizing new opportunities, such as launching a new project, taking on leadership roles, or exploring a different career path, which can lead to career advancement.
- In a professional setting, uncertainty sharpens problem-solving abilities. When clear solutions aren’t readily available, it forces employees to approach challenges from different perspectives. For example, during a crisis, employees who are comfortable with uncertainty tend to think more critically and creatively, allowing them to find effective solutions that others might overlook.
- Surprisingly, accepting uncertainty in the workplace can reduce stress. Instead of wasting energy worrying about the unknown, professionals who embrace uncertainty focus on what they can control and accept that change is inevitable. This mental shift leads to better stress management and prevents burnout.
As you can see, the benefits are many, but the road to reaching a place where you can sit comfortably with uncertainty can be hard. We understand. And it is not a linear process either. You will feel great one day, at peace even. And on other days you will want to fall back into your pattern of thinking of the worst case scenarios. During such periods, it is okay to remember you’re human and no one is perfect. It is okay to reach out for support–personal or professional.
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